Some people we can get along with easily. We meet them and we just click. They understand what we say, they can finish our sentences and vice versa. They’re just on the same wavelength. They are fun to be around because they validate our self-concept, our ego and give us a boost. In short they’re a pleasure to be around.
Others though are a challenge. Maybe they’re more gruff, more prickly, more cantankerous. They do not stroke our ego, they attack it. It’s not rewarding to be around them…
unless we rearrange our ego.
Contrarily this makes them ultimately more rewarding to be around. Because to get along with them we have to grow. We have to grow to understand them. We have to grow to get past our petty sensitivities. In other words the barrier between us liking them is in our ego. And so they make us get over ourselves.
So we have the people we like as we are, but will often reinforce our ego, and so maintain us at the level of evolution we’re at. They give us a momentary boost because they make us feel good about ourself.
Then we have the grouchy pests who bug us, but provoke us to grow and so live at more evolved levels. Ultimately these are responsible for us reaching higher levels of happiness.
Next time you come across someone you don’t immediately bond with, remember it might be worth taking the time to break down those barriers. Or all you’ll be left with is the low hanging fruit.
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1 comment so far ↓
I so know what you mean their are books published addressing this subject on ‘ How to deal with difficult people” well I do ok but Im thinking get lost annoying one is in my mind at the time of thir annoyance. I have had a co-orkr actually call me stupid which Im not but he was being a jerk of course in the long-run I got layed off for saying anything to the boss because of his insult I lose my job how just is that to lose ones job?
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